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Thursday, October 7, 2010

A Tale of Pissed Pants

Having finished watching bicenntenial man and still in deep thought completely normal after any movie I ventured outside my home for my last cigarette of the night as I step outside darkness surrounds me with only the moon to light my path. A cool breeze hits my face and in complete silence you hear a strike of a lighter as my cigarette starts to burn, A couple of minutes pass and it being cold It was my smart idea not to wear any shoes, My feet start to get cold and I feel the sudden urge to Pee having sat through a two hour movie consuming nothing but water. Too lazy to go inside and use the bathroom since it would involve me putting out my cigarette I decide to do what many men naturally do and what nature intended, I find a nearby bush and begin to pee, as a steady stream of piss flows towards this lovely bush I begin to look at the clouds the Majesty of the night consumes me and little did I know I had walked into what some might call a bear trap, feeling something I've felt many times a stringy substance envelops my foot what seems to feel like a spider web and suddenly still at peace I look down to find a brown recluse at my feet, fearing the worst case senario that I would get bitten as if almost human instinct I jump away and shake off the dreadful arachnid, but sadly I did not have time to stop my constant flow of pee. So In a nutshell there I am glad to not have been bitten but it came at a cost, the bottom half of my shirt had been soaked and my PJ's drenched in Pee. I guess to every action there is an equal and opposite reaction but luckily I speak to you now with a clean pair of PJ's and a memory that will remain written in stone of the night I pissed my pants.

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

How fast can't the Internet get you famous?


For this little dude pretty quick, He uploaded this video October 2nd and Already has 1.6 Million hits on youtube, what do you think of the video? And would you put yourself in his shoes for the fame?

Monday, October 4, 2010

THE MAN WITH HALF A PHONE.

I am that man...
This is my phone...
Photobucket

Yesterday myself and a couple of friends ventured into the Lighthouse beach .. Biscayne.. For a lack of a bathing suit I decided to use these shorts with pockets.. during the barbecue i was using my phone minute after minute on AIM Text and calling.. I suddenly put away my phone and let time pass while munching on a world famous Bubba Burger. Time passes and we decide we're stuffed and we're about ready to hit the beach. Suddenly on the sand racing to the water I managed to make it in 3rd place but at what cost? My phone remained in my pocket as I floated in the water.. I quickly rushed out to save the remains of what is my phone but it is far too late my phone is submerged in not just normal water but saltwater so even when it evaporates salty remains will stay. I figure there's no point in crying over spilled milk so I continue to have fun at the beach... Then I arrive home with a headache that feels as if an 80 pound mallet is smashing my head open. I pop two advils and start the journey to fix my phone (I will not take it to the insurance and have to pay 130 to have those evil blood sucking bastards give me a Piece of Shit Refurbished Phone) I start playing around with Parts from an old broken phone and mix both together with the batterys and the end result of 3 to 4 hours of tinkering around is what you see.. None of my screens worked but I managed to get half a phone working And I decide rather than pay 130 bucks for a phone I'll just buy a new screen and that is what I did. My new screen (Value: $25) should be coming in 3 days depending how fast the seller on ebay wants to ship it.

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